I am...

Has anyone seen the movie Fight Club? Well... I have... once... a few months ago. This movie alone stands out to me. Anyone wonder why? I sure don't; however, I do love the fact that everything you go through in life only makes you stronger. Sometimes I wish there were a girls Fight Club... that would rock my world. I would be there right now if I could. Why? I'm pissed.

I am Ginnie's anger. Earlier today I was suppressed through exercise but not all the way. I always linger there through happiness and depression. I (Ginnie... not my anger..whaha) have been blown off too many times by one person in particular... the bf. You can look at my previous blog and see what I mostly have to say.... but now for today. He was supposed to come up here to UGA for the weekend.

I am Ginnie's giddy and girly side. I go out and treat myself to a pedicure... haven't had one in a while... toenails look pretty now. He still isn't here... it's 6 o'clock... where is he? Call the cell... no answer (about three tries... no answer). Get to the dorm... he's online! Online implies home.

I am Ginnie's anger.... enraged by every fucking thing in this world. I say fuck you and the world you live in!
I am Ginnie's anger... not quite to my peak yet. "I thought you were coming up here tonite and we would go out." "not today." Not today I say to myself!!!??? What could I have done this weekend instead of wasting my time on you (thinking this stuff in my head... notice no quotes)? I could be home... I could be hanging out with friends I care about. "Why?" I asked. "I had other things to do today." "like....(long pause) what is more important than me at this current moment?" NO REPLY!!! Fuck you and the world you live in! This is your loss bf... not mine!

I am Ginnie's anger.... no longer suppressed.... I am out full and loaded! I want a punching bag.... oh my kingdom for a punching bag!

I am Ginnie's forgiveness..... The anger is too strong to overcome.

I am Ginnie's tears.... none have been shed for you(ever).

I am Ginnie's faith in God and purity.... I overcome all obstacles.

I am Ginnie's calmness... Subduing Ginnie's anger.